Answer: Slim and nun
Us women all know what we want and most men are mystified about that, but do we know what men want, other than just about their testosterone?
Perhaps this explains the honeymoon syndrome, when the relationship is bliss and wonderful. Some couples are able to continue that state of bliss, while others fall off of it quite quickly. Once off, it is hard to get back on the bliss wagon – but not impossible.
Here’s the answer, from a podcast of James Altchuler and his guest, Brett McKay from The Art of Manliness:
James Altchuler: What do you think is the most important thing a woman should know about a man that a woman probably doesn’t know?
Brett McKay: Here’s one thing and they have research to back this up. Men are very sensitive or attuned to status. We all know that. Men are hierarchal. But men actually respond more adversely to status defeat or status slights than women do. There are parts of brain that fire up. We release more adrenaline and cortisol whenever we experience some sort of status defeat. That’s when we look bad in front of others.
So yeah, that whole thing that men want more respect and women want love, there’s some truth to that. There’s some scientific truth to back that up. So understand that status and how a man feels other people are perceiving them as, that’s important. You can laugh at it as a sensitive male ego but that’s the thing. That’s how we’re hardwired. So just keep that in consideration whenever you’re interacting with your menfolk.
What do you think? Pretty simple and Aunty thinks, pretty true. On the other side, for men to figure out what a woman wants is not so simple, not simple at all.
Interesting read! I want respect and love…can I have both?
Of course! And so does he.
Lucky for us that Aunty pursues and provides scientific advice-to-live-by, even on interpersonal or marital relationships which in retrospect help us to understand the bumps & rough times caused by status-loss in our mates. The connection between behavior and central nervous system makes we wonder if status sensitivity increases brain power or healthier spines. An enlightening article reminding me to be more forgiving for past or present attitudes. Mahalo, Aunty!
Aloha Tutu! There probably is a connection between how we feel about ourselves, or how our significant other feels about us, and our brain power and health in general. Forgiveness is divine! Either that, or I choose to forget.
Men want respect, and women want love. Interesting concept.
Simple concept, but the more I think about it, the more true it becomes – especially about men needed to feel respected, and not put down. Women wanting love though, is not so simple, for each of us has different standards and expectations about what love is.